The headlines and statistics about Internet predators can be
unnerving. It’s difficult enough being a parent without worrying about
Internet safety as well. Luckily, parenting a child online is not so
different from parenting a child in the “real world.” The key is to
remember that the Internet is a lot more like the real world than like
television, to which it is so often compared.
Parents often set
curfews and have rules about visiting a friend’s house without an adult
present. They expect to meet friends, boyfriends, and girlfriends in
person. They want to know where a child is going and what they’re going
to be doing before they leave the house. When kids are young or if they
are going further from home, there is usually a chaperone present.
Parents frequently ground their children or take away privileges for not
obeying. You may or may not enforce similar rules in your home, but
they are an excellent starting place for creating a positive and safe
online experience.
Talk to your children. Much like anything else, it’s important that your child knows what your expectations are, understands the basics of Internet safety, and feels comfortable talking to you about problems and concerns.
Set guidelines.
Create a set of guidelines about when and how long your children can
use the computer. Be clear about what they can and cannot do online. If
they need to complete chores or homework first, outline that as well.
Discuss things like instant messaging, chat rooms, blogs, and social
networking sites (Instagram, Facebook), virtual worlds (Club Penguin, Webkinz).
Work out a contract with your children about household expectations and
have everyone sign it. Don't forget to come up with consequences for
breaking the rules.
Follow through. It is
important to stick with your rules. It’s true that kids need boundaries
and, as much as they fight you on it, count on you to set them. Set a
timer for online activity. Use monitoring software that tracks where
they are going and what they are doing.
Pay attention.
It’s not enough for your computer to be in a central location in your
home if you’re not paying attention to what your kids are doing. Make a
habit of pulling up a chair and talking to your child about what they’re
doing. If you expect to know who your kids are with and where they go
when they leave the house, this is no different.
Read more about it.
If you ask your child what they’re doing and you don’t understand the
answer, it’s time to read more about it. Visit the website if possible,
search for related news about it and see if you can find an article here
on About.com or another site. Whatever path you take, it’s important to
understand what your kids are going when they’re online.
Join the fun.
This is no different from attending a sporting match or chaperoning a
dance or field trip. If your child has taken an interest in an online
community such as Webkinz, Neopets, Facebook, etc., find out what they
like about it. Sign up for your own account and add your child as a
“friend.” This allows you to have a better sense of what they’re doing
and what sort of things they’re coming in contact with, but it also
shows your kids that you’re interested in their activities.
Use available technology.
There is no shortage of Internet Safety tools available to help you
control, track and/or limit what your kids can say and do online. Take
the time to learn about Internet filters, firewalls, monitoring
software, browsers for kids
and other tools. While they are not a replacement for strong parenting,
they can help make your task easier, especially with younger children.
Do a little sleuthing.
Use your browser history, cache and cookies to find out what sites your
kids have been visiting. This is not to suggest that you should spy on
your child, but a spot check now and again is a good idea. Enter their
names (including nicknames) into popular search engines to see if they
have public profiles on social networking sites. Do the same with your
address and phone number. You might be surprised by how much of your
personal information is online!
Watch for warning signals.
A child who is reluctant to talk to you about what they’re doing online
or seems to be withdrawing from family and/or friends may have a
problem. It can be easy to chalk up certain things to normal teenage
behavior, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore changes in your
child’s personality. Cyberbullying is just one experience that may cause your child to withdraw.
Know when to say, “No.”
If your child continually spends too much time online or ignores rules
about what they can and cannot do, it may be time to pull the plug on
the Internet as a sort of "virtual grounding." Although your child may
disagree, they can survive without it. Make sure you’re clear about why
you’re doing it and how long it will last. Consider what you’ll do if
they have a homework project that requires access, and remember that
they may be able to use computers at school, the library, and a friend’s
house. They may even be able to browse the web on their cellphone.
source: about.com
