By Murphy Moroney, PopSugar
Warning: major 9 Months With Courteney Cox spoilers ahead!
After fighting an uphill battle with infertility for nearly 10 years, Candace and Tim Farris were willing to do anything to expand their family. But despite trying different ways to conceive - including one round of in vitro fertilization (IVF) - they were still down on their luck. Before opting to do a second round of IVF, they agreed to document their infertility journey on the Facebook Watch series 9 Months With Courteney Cox, and yes, you're going to need tissues.
"It's one of those things where every month, you're hoping this is the month," Candace told POPSUGAR. "I think the desire to be a mom and the dire need to have a family was greater than anything else. It pushed me to keep trying, and when one avenue failed, we tried another one. We tried intrauterine insemination [IUI], we tried conceiving naturally, and we did our first round of IVF. When things kept failing it was like, 'OK, I still have that desire to be a mom.'"
"I think the desire to be a mom and the dire need to have a family was greater than anything else. It pushed me to keep trying, and when one avenue failed, we tried another one."
No matter what Candace and Tim did throughout the years, the desire to be parents was always lying dormant in the background. While the couple considered fostering and adoption, in the end, it wasn't the right choice for them.
"We did the whole 'maybe we'll live life without children' thing for a while," Candace said. "We traveled and we had a good time and we enjoyed each other. But the desire to have kids just kept coming up, and so we considered adoption and fostering. But I think sometimes people look at that as a cure for infertility. I think adoption and foster are amazing, but we wanted to have our own biological children."
Keep reading for the rest of Candace and Tim's journey.
Although going through IVF is extremely hard on a woman's body, Tim admits that the process also did a number on him emotionally.
"At certain points, I felt there was nothing I could do to help the situation," he said. "We both had [fertility-related] surgery, and then we had an IVF fail. The second round of IVF was pretty overwhelming. Candace keeps saying that I was her support system, but really, we were a support system for each other. It is heartbreaking and frustrating to be put in a situation and have no control over it."
After completing the second round, Candace took a pregnancy test and saw something she'd never seen before: two pink lines.
"It's definitely a mix of emotions because you're so excited when you see those two lines, but they don't always mean that it's going to be a viable pregnancy," Candace explained. "Inside, I was so excited because I had never seen those two lines on a pregnancy test. But I was still guarding my heart because there could be a possibility that when I get my blood work done or we go to an ultrasound that they won't see what they need to see there."
She continued: "I wanted to be so excited, but it had just been such a long journey and I had been disappointed so many times before. It was a mix of emotions. I was trying not to set myself up to be disappointed. But I also enjoyed that moment and basked in just that joy of seeing those beautiful two lines on that pregnancy test."
Despite their initial fears, the soon-to-be parents got word from their fertility doctor that everything was looking good. In fact, Candace admits her pregnancy was fairly easy. "It was an amazing pregnancy," she said. "I was hiking the whole time. I'm a vegetarian so I ate really healthy. I didn't have morning sickness. I vomited once only because I overate because I was so excited. It was absolutely amazing!"
After nine long months of waiting, Candace and Tim's daughter - appropriately named Victory - made her debut. "Victory was a name that I thought was just really pretty from the first time I heard it 10 years ago - before we even knew we would have all the issues that we had trying to conceive," Candace explained. "But after all of the struggles that we've had, it was just even more fitting and perfect for her."
Fast forward two months, and the pair are soaking up every last second of baby bliss with their newborn. "Fatherhood is one of the most humbling, exciting, loving experiences I've ever had," Tim gushed. "I'm truthfully overjoyed. Candace laughs at me because I can't stop holding her. I'm just so in love with this little girl. My wife says she already has me wrapped around her finger because before she even starts crying, she makes little sounds and I come running, and like, 'What's wrong? What's wrong? What does she need?'"
Now that Candace finally has the baby she's been dreaming about for almost 10 years, she has some advice for couples struggling with infertility.
"It's so cliche, but don't give up," she said. "If you're on a pathway, sometimes the pathway changes, but the destination is the same. Sometimes the path doesn't take you [straight there]. You think it will happen naturally, or you think it will happen through IUI, but sometimes it takes IVF, it takes surrogacy, it takes adoption. Just to be open-minded, but just don't give up. When one way doesn't work, then try another. And when five ways don't work, then try a sixth way."
As for what's on the horizon for the Farris family? More kids, hopefully!
"We're open to whatever the future holds," Candace said. "I definitely don't want Victory to be an only child. I want her to have somebody to talk things through and celebrate life with."
